I lost my phone the other day and in an effort to find it I grabbed the land line handset and dialed the first number that came to me. Which wasn't my number, it was my husbands. He was in Charlotte at a conference so didn't get the call. I re-dialed my number, found my phone in a pink talking picnic basket toy, along with the car keys, some receipts and a random selection of pebbles and didn't think anymore of it.
Shortly afterwards, I get a call from Nick. He's in a taxi with a colleague and through the background muffles sounds worried,
"Hi, sorry I didn't call sooner, is everything alright?"
Weird. I reply that we are all good. Nick mentioned he didn't have time to talk but just wanted to make sure everything was fine.
Our quick call and the anxiousness I could feel through the phone reminded me of changed times. There was a time before my diagnosis (and kids) that he wouldn't have worried about a missed call. He wouldn't have felt that surge of anxiousness when he saw my name in the missed call list. It made me a little sad as there would have been a time when he'd feel happy seeing my name pop up there. It reminded me that whilst I am navigating the new normal of life post cancer, so is he.
Coincidentally, I came across this article today on the lack of attention given to the emotional impact a cancer diagnosis has on spouses and family members, specifically following successful treatment.
http://well.blogs.nytimes.com/2013/07/12/anxiety-lingers-long-after-cancer/?_r=0
Fortunately these anxious little moments pass and plonk us back in the beauty of the present. Or in today's case, the beauty of cleaning my favourite red lipstick off Maya the dog...
As you can see I'm also adjusting to the challenges of parenting two toddlers
Shortly afterwards, I get a call from Nick. He's in a taxi with a colleague and through the background muffles sounds worried,
"Hi, sorry I didn't call sooner, is everything alright?"
Weird. I reply that we are all good. Nick mentioned he didn't have time to talk but just wanted to make sure everything was fine.
Our quick call and the anxiousness I could feel through the phone reminded me of changed times. There was a time before my diagnosis (and kids) that he wouldn't have worried about a missed call. He wouldn't have felt that surge of anxiousness when he saw my name in the missed call list. It made me a little sad as there would have been a time when he'd feel happy seeing my name pop up there. It reminded me that whilst I am navigating the new normal of life post cancer, so is he.
Coincidentally, I came across this article today on the lack of attention given to the emotional impact a cancer diagnosis has on spouses and family members, specifically following successful treatment.
http://well.blogs.nytimes.com/2013/07/12/anxiety-lingers-long-after-cancer/?_r=0
Fortunately these anxious little moments pass and plonk us back in the beauty of the present. Or in today's case, the beauty of cleaning my favourite red lipstick off Maya the dog...
As you can see I'm also adjusting to the challenges of parenting two toddlers
Evie : No remorse, Maya : Guilty, Guilty, Guilty, Isobel: Attempting to flee the scene
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